Nature vs Nurture

For all you sensitive people, I am going to be using some clinical words, so just cover your eyes. Yesterday, on my way to take my 5 year old to the store, my son said Girls (wait for it.....) don't have a penis, they have a vagina. I said yes that's right. I was hoping the conversation would end there but it did not. He continued on with the v-jay jay, pondering. Can you see a vagina when your naked, I said yes. Then, he said in his best distraught voice -I'm never going to see a vagina, hey maybe someone will wear a vagina costume at Halloween. My vote goes to nature.

thanks

Thank you for never leaving me even when I was running as far and fast as I could,
Thank you for letting me choose my own path, even when it turned out a disaster.
Thank you for allowing me to experience such sorrow that for a while crippled me
Thank you for letting me wallow in my own humanity, only to clean me up and watch me do it again (and again)
Thank you for reminding me, that it is not me who is holding on to you, but that you are holding on to me.
My arms are not strong enough to hold on when so much is pulling at me feet, My heart is not wise enough to not want the things that destroy me.

The song that never ends

My night has been like a song that is catchy at first but then won't leave you alone. Why won't my children go to sleep? They are tired, they are crabby, they are annoying me. I really want this night to end so that I can sit on the couch with Craig. It is a small request but will not happen soon. I call this little ditty moonlight waltz #5

Liam: Mama, I want something to eat, Mama I want something to drink. Mama am I doing good?
Grant: gibberish followed by daddy
Liam: Am I doing good? Am I doing good? Am I doing good?
Grant: gibberish followed by daddy
Me: We will shut your door if you are not quiet
Liam: will you shut the door after I get a drink?
Craig: You have a drink, We will shut your door if you say one more word
Liam: Is drink head a word?

Goodnight to all.

living gratefully

This is my deep thought for this week, maybe this month.... Living gratefully- to me this means operating my life in a way that shows that everything is enough. For me, there is rumbling in my spirit in two specific areas. Money & Food. I have occasionally spent beyond our means. I shall come clean now, I have done that more than occasionally. Food, I have eaten way too much, all too often. I have lived in a way that says /not enough, what you have given me is not enough. The truth is that I have more than enough, really more than enough. Not in the humble, I'll be happy with what I have attitude but I have the cold hard facts to prove I have enough. A moment of clarity, when my eyes have been blurred and my thoughts foggy.

More to kill

I bought some more plants yesterday. I don't know why, I am not good with flowers, Have never been good with flowers and I'm pretty sure one day the trees are going to fall on me out of spite. I want to apologize to mother nature right now. I think I'm a serial killer, I can't stop, I need a plant fix. They look so good. I will take a pic and post it. A before and after shot. They should create a department of plant services, to investigate plant abuse and remove the plants from homes like mine. I'm off to drive on some grass.

Voted off the Island

This morning my son got really mad at me "You are never going to be a part of this family again" and then took me by the hand and told me I had to stay in the basement from now on. I was shocked, hurt and amused all at the same time. Where does he learn this? I told him that he looked really upset and maybe going to have some private time might help him to feel better so that he doesn't use hurtful words. To which my sweet, kind boy said "I will after you tell me where your going to live now" I am the weakest link. Goodbye

Chap stick fetish

I have 15 tubes of chap stick. I have stashed a tube in every conceivable location in my home and car. I have 3 in my purse and one attached to a key ring. 2 in the diaper bag (one in each pocket), 1 in the family room, living room and bathroom, 2 in my bedroom, (one in each nightstand). and 2 in my overnight bag. The rest are unopened in the bathroom closet. It started quite innocently with chapped lips in the winter but after finding a tube in my purse with crumbs on it (my 5 yr old). I decided that I needed to keep the love to myself. So, you see I have one 1 for children to use, 1 for my honey and the rest (she laughs maniacally) for myself. I can't even remember how I bought so many, I never find them on sale, I haven't treked the desert and don't recall being in a recent drought. I may have a problem.

Movie Night in the pole barn.

Going to see Indiana Jones with my honey. Babysitter will be here at 4, movie and popcorn at 4:30. Yes, I know it is early but hey, by the time we fork over $25 for babysitting, pay for the tickets, buy snacks, it's a pretty good slice of cake. The only thing we are not too fond of is the actual theater. We are so spoiled. When we lived in Phoenix the ushers wore jackets and ties. There were 26 screens, you could buy tickets on line. It was our paradise. Now that we live in Ken-tucky (for us northerners) or Kan-tuc-key (for the southerners) the theater is in a huge pole barn looking building. Still, we are blown up excited for our date night even if it is in a giant pole barn.

Ghost Hunters

Every week, my honey and I watch Ghost Hunters, mostly because it is fascinating and the show often just raises more questions which lead to pretty funny discussions. Okay, here are my questions/observations.

1. Why would a ghost be stuck anywhere and do they get to choose. Quite of few of these "spirits" are bound to wherever they died or worked. Now, my first job was in a restaurant and if the rules are,you stay where you worked, I definitely would be an angry ghost. What if you died from a bear attack, do you haunt the bear or just the woods.

2. Why do a good portion of the EVP's say "Get Out" If I'm a ghost and I can finally be heard, I am not going to send away the only people who can hear me. I would say Get me out of the restaurant/woods and away from the bear.

3. I'm not sure..but if the spirit drains energy sources why do the lights on the camera man's equipment always stay on, along with the recording equipment. Why not the drain the battery on the vehicles and get a real jolt of energy.

Here is my disclaimer: We love the show, some strange unexplainable things happen. Also, we have our own faith system that explains things for us. So....please no hate mail and don't haunt us. Go Jay and Grant.

Wisdom?

Hold on to your seats while I digress into a little verbal tantrum. I have read 5 different blogs (other than mine) today and there will inevitably be one of these "I thank God for the wisdom he has given you" sort of comment. Please let me say from where I am sitting, wisdom is a sanitized word for knowledge of failure. People are not just magically or mystically given a dose of wisdom, we earn it. Every last mistake, if we are paying attention and don't like pain, we will acquire this knowledge of failure. I guess if I go by my own definition, than I am really, really wise. I have made a lot of mistakes, a good portion with my eyes wide open. The problem I see is that when we put human beings up on a pedestal for being more than we are, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment, As well as cutting our "hero" off from the rest of us, leaving them to fend for themselves. Tantrum Over... I need a nap. Irritation is exhausting.

Why?

I've been on this planet for a while and have seen, done and thought about doing a lot of things but I have never thought of this. Playing hi-ya with the dog with a steak knife (my five year old, three days ago). Booby trapping the family room with the garbage from the trash (again, my five year old) for the dog, while chasing him with the vacuum attachment. Finally, pouring his juice box all over his baby brother, just "because he was thirsty" So in case you are wondering what the outcome or consequences of these ideas were. I'll fill you in. The hi-ya game resulted in a Huge gash in my boy's thumb, which meant he missed Tucker (the 70 lb yellow lab, that owns us)
and Tucker was unscathed. We debated on stitches, my loving spouse said just patch him up but looking back, stitches might have been in order, because the next day during his soccer practice, he pulled the bandages off and bled all over the place, which he thought was pretty cool. He told everyone a bear got him, He probably should have booby trapped the playing field. About the mine/booby trap field (family room) My son had to clean up his mess with a stern warning that the trash stays in the trash can. Finally, I gave the baby a bath and again a conversation with my son about not pouring ANYTHING on his brother. Now that your a year older,
How do you spend your day?

The hardest job

I have concluded the hardest job I will or have ever had is being a parent. I know that is not news to so many people but I'm semi-new at it. My kids are only 5 and 1 and they are both boys to boot. I didn't grow up with brothers so....the things they can do are at times flat out weird and foreign to me. For me, the hardest part of my job is not knowing what to do. Most everything else in life comes with instructions but not this. You never know if you're doing the right thing or not and you won't know for many years to come. Today, my five year old has spent countless minutes in the naughty seat. Forget all of this, just now my little guy came in and said. "I just came in to see if you want to share my cheetos Gotta go.

P