The Clingenpeel method

Most obits smooth over the details using terms like, left this life or entered into rest-Not this family. They just put it out there. If they are true to form, the rest of his obit should read like this.

Bennie was put in a overpriced wooden box,
you can come stare at him on Tuesday.





Kokomo Tribune; Kokomo, Indiana - Bennie Lee Clingenpeel: "Bennie Lee Clingenpeel
Sept. 6, 1932 - June 1, 2009

Bennie Lee Clingenpeel, 76, Kokomo, was found dead Monday, June 1, 2009, at his home. He was born Sept. 6, 1932, in Clinton County, to Roy J. and Lillian R. (Morris) Clingenpeel."

Chap stick fetish

I have 15 tubes of chap stick. I have stashed a tube in every conceivable location in my home and car. I have 3 in my purse and one attached to a key ring. 2 in the diaper bag (one in each pocket), 1 in the family room, living room and bathroom, 2 in my bedroom, (one in each nightstand). and 2 in my overnight bag. The rest are unopened in the bathroom closet. It started quite innocently with chapped lips in the winter but after finding a tube in my purse with crumbs on it (my 5 yr old). I decided that I needed to keep the love to myself. So, you see I have one 1 for children to use, 1 for my honey and the rest (she laughs maniacally) for myself. I can't even remember how I bought so many, I never find them on sale, I haven't treked the desert and don't recall being in a recent drought. I may have a problem.