Technology gone wrong

Seriously, today I had very ominous e-mails from strange places. Weight Watchers sent me an e-mail that said "Why aren't you loosing weight", I was eating breakfast at the time. I think they have agents in my neighborhood and man are they judgemental. Then classmates sent a message that said "we found your friends", I think there might be a ransom to follow. If you are a friend of mine, I apologize for your abduction. Then my facebook page said, Patti, find out what God has to say to you. Apparently he has been talking behind my back.

vampires

Liam: I had the craziest dream last night, ya I said crazy

Me: What was it

Liam: I dreamed a vampire was chasing me but I ran away

Me: Was it scary

Liam: Well..... everyone knows how I feel about vampires

no pants required

Me: Why don't you have your pants on

6 yr old son: They are outside

Me: I thought you were camping in the backyard

6 yr old: I don't need pants to go camping, I'm a boy. Girls need to wear pants and a hat

girl in the next bed

Dear girl in the next bed,



Hearing you and your family light up the night sky with the f bomb was especially heartwarming and I didn't realize that your dad could foghorn burp for hours. His ability to snore over your cell phone play list is admirable. I do agree that your drunk posse should be able to sleep on the floor and I shared your joy that they didn't get busted. And having a complete stranger urinate on the bathroom floor does make you giggle. I remember just like it was yesterday the midnight picnics that you and your mom shared and yes, turning on the lights did create the perfect dining atmosphere. Most of all I enjoyed the sense of adventure we shared as you didn't like to wash your hands.....ever, nothing says excitement like guess which knob i didn't touch.